Log in to access your menu with tools for managing 📝 tasks, 👥 clients, 💰 finances, 📖 learning, 🔍 personal growth, and 🌟 spirituality, all in one place!.
Welcome to AckySHINE, your go-to platform for personal growth, productivity, and well-being, offering tools tailored to organize your life, manage finances, and deepen your journey.
Updated at: 2024-05-25 17:52:24 (1 year ago by SW - Melkisedeck Shine)
MUME: "Unajua mi unanishangaza sana, kila siku nakusikia mara useme TV yangu, gari yangu, chumbani kwangu, mara hoo watoto wangu. Sisi ni mke na mume, kila kitu ni chetu. Jirekebishe bwana".👴😎😎😒 MKE: Yuko kimya anaendelea na shughuli zake za kupekua kabatini kama hasikii, na hakumjibu kitu mumewe.👵😷 MUME: Akamuuliza kwa hamaki,"Sasa hapo unatafuta nini?".👴😡 MKE: "Sidiria yetu!!"👙💏 MUME: (kamfungia kabatini alafu kamwambia. "nipo chumbani , ")👴😷😷 💃💃💃💃💃💃 😂😂😂😂😂😂
Updated at: 2024-05-25 17:17:38 (1 year ago by SW - Melkisedeck Shine)
Teacher: Who is a pharmacist?
Shemdoe raised up his hand.
Teacher: So it’s only Shemdoe that can tell who a pharmacist is in this class? So there is no body else to answer the question except Shemdoe? (There was no reply from the students)
Teacher: Ok now Shemdoe, chukua hii fimbo, charaza vilaza hawa wote kila mmoja viboko kumi…. Shemdoe akiwa amevimba kichwa, akawatwanga viboko kumi kumi vya kushiba darasa nzima
Teacher: Now, my dear Shemdoe tell this dumb students who a pharmacist is…
Shemdoe: Yes, sir. A Pharmacist is a farmer who assists people. Shemdoe saiv amelazwa MOI kwa wataalam wa mifupa 🏃
Hii ndio ndoto ya harusi ya kila msichana anayotamani
GIRL: Baby, hebu niambie harusi yetu itakuwaje?
BOY: Yaani hii haijawahi kushuhudiwa, ngoja nikupe kionjo kidogo tu
GIRL: Enhee…
BOY: Kwanza siku ya kupeleka mahari nitaswaga zizi zima la ng'ombe napeleka kwa babu yako
GIRL: Ooh baby u care..
Updated at: 2024-05-25 18:05:44 (1 year ago by SW - Melkisedeck Shine)
GIRL: Baby, hebu niambie harusi yetu itakuwaje?
BOY: Yaani hii haijawahi kushuhudiwa, ngoja nikupe kionjo kidogo tu
GIRL: Enhee…
BOY: Kwanza siku ya kupeleka mahari nitaswaga zizi zima la ng'ombe napeleka kwa babu yako
GIRL: Ooh baby u care..
BOY: Siyo hivyo tu, baba yako ntamnunulia Range Rover Sport na mama mkwe ntampa Range Rover Evoque
GIRL: Baby u are awesome…
BOY: Halagu mdogo wako wa kiume ntampa Prado Tx, na hapo nimesukutua tu mdomo sijaanza kula….
GIRL: Enhee…na sisi??
BOY: Sisi tutachukua mtaa mzima Oysterbay, kila wiki tutaishi nyumba tofauti
Halafu siku ya harusi yetu tutakodi zile meli zinabeba makontena ndiyo iwe ukumbi wetu, itatupeleka hadi Maldives
GIRL: Baby I love you
BOY: Tukitoka hapo tunaenda honeymoon Bahamas….halafu tunaenda Taiwan shopping ya fenicha, kisha Japan shopping ua electronics, halafu tunaenda Dubai nikununulie vito vya thamani
GIRL: Ooh my sweetheart…halafu tukitoka huko??
BOY: Tukitoka huko nachukua ndoo ya maji nakumwagia uzinduke usingizini na ndoto yako imeishia hapo
Eti ni kweli hii ni sababu wanaume wana Upendo Sana?
Updated at: 2024-05-25 16:52:50 (1 year ago by SW - Melkisedeck Shine)
Wanaume wana upendo kwa kweli.
Mwanaume hata akipewa kundi la wanawake 90 achague mmoja!! Hata akichagua mzuri kupita wote bado roho itamuuma kuwaacha wale 89 waliobaki!!* Kwa namna hii wanaume wana Upendo Sana 😂😂😂😂😂😂
Updated at: 2024-05-25 17:15:38 (1 year ago by SW - Melkisedeck Shine)
Kuna mchepuko nilimtumia nauli jana ili aje,.kwang sasa leo kaniambia eti " nimesahau ile line yenye M-pesa home plz nitumie tena kwa tigo mpenz""!! Me nikajifanya chizi nikatuma Kule kule kwenye voda (aliosema kaacha home) Nikatuma huko message ivi "nikuongezee Sh. Ngapi tena mpenz..!!" Akanjbu "elfu 20,000 tu mpenzi" Mtuhurumie jamani 😂😂😂
Updated at: 2024-05-25 16:53:11 (1 year ago by SW - Melkisedeck Shine)
1, mwanaume kuoga haraka haraka ili uwahi kuangalia igizo, huo ni UMAMA..😂
2, mwanaume kupiga picha umeng'ata Lips na Unapiga na Camera Beauty Plus huo ni UMAMA..😂
3, Mwanaume kuangalia tamthilia na Jamai Raja na Maigizo kwenye chanel ya sinema zetu wakati mechi za kombe la dunia zinaendelea, pia nawe ni MMAMAA…😂😂
4, Mwanaume kuandika 'Jomon' badala ya Jamani, kuandika 'Pw' badala ya Poa, kuandika 'Thatha' badala ya Sasa, kumwandikia mwanaume mwenzio 'Mambo my' Huu ni UDADA, tena UDADA wa CHUO..😂 . 5, Mwanaume kunywa soda au Juice na kubakisha, kununua chakula halafu unakibakisha, kubagua bagua chakula na kujamba hovyo hovyo baada ya kushiba, huo nao ni UMAMAA..😂 . 6, Mwanaume kumuuliza mwanaume mwenzio anapata faida gani kuangalia Mpira, pia nawe ni MMAMA… . 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
