Short answer: He got twelve months!
Explanation: Well, you see, when the man stole the calendar from the store, he thought he was just getting a free calendar. Little did he know, calendars have a way of keeping track of time. So, instead of escaping with his loot, he ended up with twelve whole months of his life! Talk about a hilarious twist of fate! ๐คฃ๐
Mercy Atieno (Guest) on November 30, 2017
What did the triangle say to the circle? Youโre pointless! ๐บโช
Hekima (Guest) on November 30, 2017
๐ I canโt stop laughing!
Chris Okello (Guest) on November 29, 2017
My life is a constant battle between wanting to be healthy and eating cupcakes. ๐ง๐ฅ
Frank Macha (Guest) on November 29, 2017
I may be a little quiet, but I have so many thoughts running through my mind that Iโm talking to myself non-stop. ๐ฃ๏ธ๐ญ
Rabia (Guest) on November 6, 2017
How do you make a tissue dance? Put a little boogie in it! ๐คง๐
Joyce Mussa (Guest) on October 31, 2017
What do you call a pig that does karate? A pork chop! ๐ท๐ฅ
Wande (Guest) on October 23, 2017
Some days, I amaze myself. Other days, I look for my phone while Iโm talking on it. ๐ฑ๐คฆโโ๏ธ
Kheri (Guest) on October 21, 2017
I wonโt be impressed with technology until I can download food. ๐๐ป
Chum (Guest) on October 16, 2017
I have to exercise early in the morning before my brain figures out what Iโm doing. ๐โโ๏ธ๐ด
Nassor (Guest) on October 13, 2017
My house was clean last week. Sorry you missed it. ๐ก๐
Emily Chepngeno (Guest) on October 8, 2017
๐คฃ Iโm literally dying of laughter!
Zulekha (Guest) on October 7, 2017
Whatโs a snowmanโs favorite snack? Ice Krispies! โ๐
Ruth Mtangi (Guest) on October 3, 2017
๐ You totally won the internet today!
Betty Kimaro (Guest) on October 2, 2017
I don't need a hair stylist. My pillow gives me a new hairstyle every morning. ๐๏ธ๐โโ๏ธ
Carol Nyakio (Guest) on September 26, 2017
๐ Needed this laugh, thanks!
Janet Mwikali (Guest) on September 4, 2017
๐ Saving this one!
Mazrui (Guest) on September 1, 2017
My wife told me to stop impersonating a flamingo. I had to put my foot down. ๐ฆฉ๐
Mary Mrope (Guest) on August 30, 2017
Why donโt bananas ever get lonely? They hang out in bunches! ๐๐ฏโโ๏ธ
Janet Wambura (Guest) on August 12, 2017
What do lawyers wear to court? Lawsuits! ๐จโโ๏ธ๐
Stephen Kangethe (Guest) on August 11, 2017
Iโve reached the age where my train of thought often leaves the station without me. ๐๐
Muslima (Guest) on July 16, 2017
I canโt believe how funny this is! ๐
Chiku (Guest) on July 15, 2017
I can resist anything except temptation. ๐๐
Chris Okello (Guest) on July 7, 2017
๐ This is gold!
Ann Wambui (Guest) on June 20, 2017
What do you call a fly without wings? A walk! ๐ชฐ๐ถโโ๏ธ
Fikiri (Guest) on June 15, 2017
Whatโs a witchโs favorite subject in school? Spelling! ๐งโโ๏ธ๐
Raha (Guest) on June 9, 2017
Whatโs brown and sticky? A stick! ๐ฟ๐
Moses Mwita (Guest) on June 8, 2017
I only know 25 letters of the alphabet. I donโt know Y. ๐ ๐ค
Nancy Kabura (Guest) on June 7, 2017
What kind of dinosaur loves to sleep? A stega-snore-us! ๐ฆ๐ด
Fikiri (Guest) on May 30, 2017
If I won the award for laziness, I would send someone to pick it up for me. ๐๐ด
Joy Wacera (Guest) on May 26, 2017
I used to think I was indecisive, but now Iโm not so sure. ๐คทโโ๏ธ๐
Safiya (Guest) on May 21, 2017
Whatโs brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Poop! ๐ฉ๐ค
George Wanjala (Guest) on May 20, 2017
Why do bananas wear sunscreen? Because they peel! ๐๐
Rose Amukowa (Guest) on May 2, 2017
What do you get when you cross a dog with a phone? A golden receiver! ๐๐
Mwanaidi (Guest) on April 30, 2017
๐ Definitely my new go-to joke!
Chris Okello (Guest) on April 29, 2017
I donโt care if the glass is half full or half empty. Iโm just glad itโs not a shot glass. ๐ฅ๐น
Monica Adhiambo (Guest) on April 15, 2017
Absolutely hilarious! Canโt get enough! ๐
Moses Kipkemboi (Guest) on April 13, 2017
Why donโt basketball players ever go on vacation? Theyโre afraid of traveling! ๐โ๏ธ
Susan Wangari (Guest) on April 13, 2017
Why did I wake up tired? I went to bed tired. ๐๐ด
Abdillah (Guest) on April 6, 2017
If at first, you donโt succeed, then skydiving definitely isnโt for you. ๐ชโ
Shamim (Guest) on April 3, 2017
This just made my coffee break so much better! โ๐
Rose Kiwanga (Guest) on March 31, 2017
Why are skeletons so calm? Nothing gets under their skin! ๐๐
Mary Kendi (Guest) on March 23, 2017
I canโt wait to tell this joke at my next party! ๐
Nancy Kabura (Guest) on March 23, 2017
I donโt have a bucket list, but my fucket list is a mile long. ๐คทโโ๏ธ๐
Diana Mallya (Guest) on March 18, 2017
Iโve got to remember this one for later! ๐
Saidi (Guest) on March 13, 2017
This joke just turned my whole mood around! ๐
Henry Sokoine (Guest) on March 7, 2017
๐ I needed that laugh!
Jackson Makori (Guest) on February 11, 2017
I decided to take an aerobics class. I bent, twisted, gyrated, and jumped. And then I got stuck in my leotard. ๐ฉณ๐
Mwagonda (Guest) on February 4, 2017
๐ Nailed it!
Salima (Guest) on February 2, 2017
Why was the math book sad? It had too many problems. ๐๐ญ
Stephen Kangethe (Guest) on January 30, 2017
What kind of dog can tell time? A watch dog! ๐โฐ
Monica Lissu (Guest) on January 24, 2017
Why does cooking take six hours, but eating takes like three seconds? โฒ๏ธ๐ฝ๏ธ
Janet Sumaye (Guest) on January 11, 2017
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet? Supplies! ๐งน๐
Zakia (Guest) on January 9, 2017
A balanced diet means a cupcake in each hand. ๐ง๐คฒ
Nuru (Guest) on January 9, 2017
Why donโt you write with a broken pencil? Because itโs pointless! โ๏ธ๐
Rose Mwinuka (Guest) on January 4, 2017
What did the duck say when it bought a snack? Put it on my bill! ๐ฆ๐ฟ
Bernard Oduor (Guest) on December 19, 2016
I don't sweatโI sparkle! โจ๐
Rose Kiwanga (Guest) on December 15, 2016
I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by. ๐โ๏ธ
Peter Tibaijuka (Guest) on December 14, 2016
Iโm not lazy, Iโm on energy-saving mode. ๐ค๐
Stephen Amollo (Guest) on December 12, 2016
I canโt brain today. I has the dumb. ๐ง ๐คฏ
Francis Mtangi (Guest) on December 8, 2016
Why donโt scientists trust stairs? Theyโre always leading you up to something! ๐งช๐ช