Short answer: He got twelve months!
Explanation: Well, you see, when the man stole the calendar from the store, he thought he was just getting a free calendar. Little did he know, calendars have a way of keeping track of time. So, instead of escaping with his loot, he ended up with twelve whole months of his life! Talk about a hilarious twist of fate! 🤣📆
Esther Cheruiyot (Guest) on September 22, 2024
Running is great. Unless you faint. 🏃♀️🥵
Aziza (Guest) on September 13, 2024
I put my phone in airplane mode, but it’s not flying! ✈️📱
Shamsa (Guest) on September 6, 2024
I love work; it fascinates me. I can sit and watch it for hours. 💻🛋️
Linda Karimi (Guest) on August 27, 2024
How does a polar bear build its house? Igloos it together! 🐻❄️🏠
Sofia (Guest) on August 26, 2024
What do you call a fish without an eye? Fsh! 🐟👁️
Yusra (Guest) on August 25, 2024
I'm on that new diet where you eat everything and hope for a miracle. 🍰😂
Wilson Ombati (Guest) on August 21, 2024
If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you. 🪂🤣
Betty Cheruiyot (Guest) on August 18, 2024
Why did the baker go to therapy? He had too much on his plate! 🍰🛋️
Wilson Ombati (Guest) on August 11, 2024
I smile because I don’t know what’s going on. 😁🤷♂️
Nancy Kabura (Guest) on August 8, 2024
I wish everything was as easy as getting fat. 🍔😆
Zainab (Guest) on August 5, 2024
There’s no 'we' in fries. 🍟🚫
Edith Cherotich (Guest) on August 2, 2024
What did the big flower say to the little flower? Hi, bud! 🌻👋
Sultan (Guest) on August 1, 2024
If my jeans could talk, they’d say, 'Stop eating!' 👖🍕
Makame (Guest) on July 29, 2024
Some days, I amaze myself. Other days, I trip over my own feet. 🤦♂️🤣
Mercy Atieno (Guest) on July 25, 2024
Common sense is like deodorant. The people who need it most never use it. 🤢🤔
Hassan (Guest) on July 24, 2024
Why do ducks always pay with cash? Because they don’t like bills! 🦆💵
Sarafina (Guest) on July 23, 2024
😂 I need to save this one forever!
Frank Sokoine (Guest) on July 22, 2024
Why did the scarecrow win an award? He was outstanding in his field! 👨🌾🏆
George Tenga (Guest) on July 13, 2024
I’m great at multitasking. I can waste time, be unproductive, and procrastinate all at once. ⏳🙃
Baraka (Guest) on July 6, 2024
Why did the orange stop? It ran out of juice! 🍊🔋
Chiku (Guest) on July 3, 2024
I hate when I’m singing a song and the artist gets the words wrong. 🎤🤷♀️
Moses Kipkemboi (Guest) on July 2, 2024
How does a lion greet other animals? Pleased to eat you! 🦁🍽️
Agnes Njeri (Guest) on June 29, 2024
If we’re not meant to have midnight snacks, why is there a light in the fridge? 🥪💡
Omari (Guest) on June 22, 2024
What kind of shoes do frogs wear? Open toad sandals! 🐸👡
Masika (Guest) on June 21, 2024
When nothing goes right, go left. ⬅️💡
Habiba (Guest) on June 10, 2024
I dusted once. It came back. I’m not falling for that again. 🧹😆
Alice Jebet (Guest) on June 9, 2024
Running late is my cardio. 🕒🏃♀️
Elizabeth Mtei (Guest) on May 27, 2024
I love naps. Like, I literally love them. They make me feel better about wasting the day. 😴🛏️
Shamsa (Guest) on May 19, 2024
Why do cows have hooves instead of feet? Because they lactose! 🐄🦶
Irene Makena (Guest) on May 14, 2024
I’m on a 30-day diet. So far, I’ve lost 15 days. 🗓️🍔
Michael Onyango (Guest) on May 11, 2024
What kind of car does a sheep drive? A lamborghini! 🐑🚗
Catherine Mkumbo (Guest) on May 10, 2024
What does a zombie vegetarian eat? Graaains! 🧟♂️🌾
Henry Sokoine (Guest) on May 8, 2024
How do you know the ocean is friendly? It waves! 🌊👋
Zakaria (Guest) on April 30, 2024
I don’t need an inspirational quote. I need coffee. ☕📖
Mariam Kawawa (Guest) on April 26, 2024
What kind of music do mummies like? Wrap music! 🎶🧻
Diana Mumbua (Guest) on April 23, 2024
If you can't remember my name, just say 'coffee,' and I'll turn around. ☕🙋♀️
Josephine Nekesa (Guest) on April 18, 2024
😆 Totally hilarious!
Grace Wairimu (Guest) on April 12, 2024
Why don’t elephants use computers? They’re afraid of the mouse! 🐘🖱️
Raha (Guest) on April 10, 2024
Dear sleep, I’m sorry we broke up this morning. I want you back! 😴💔
David Kawawa (Guest) on April 8, 2024
I thought I wanted a career, turns out I just wanted paychecks. 💼💸
Omari (Guest) on April 7, 2024
People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day. 😴🙃
Athumani (Guest) on April 3, 2024
Love this! Keep them coming! 😁
Mwinyi (Guest) on April 2, 2024
I told myself I should stop drinking, but I’m not about to listen to a drunk who talks to himself. 🍺😂
Samson Mahiga (Guest) on March 31, 2024
Why do cows have hooves instead of feet? Because they lactose! 🐄🦶
Hashim (Guest) on March 22, 2024
I don’t know how to act my age because I’ve never been this age before. 🤔🎂
Sharon Kibiru (Guest) on February 29, 2024
😆 This one really got me!
Jane Muthui (Guest) on February 25, 2024
Life is too short to be serious all the time. So, if you can’t laugh at yourself, call me—I’ll laugh at you. 😂📞
Francis Njeru (Guest) on February 22, 2024
I’d rather be someone’s shot of whiskey than everyone’s cup of tea. 🥃☕
Mohamed (Guest) on February 20, 2024
What do you call a chicken staring at lettuce? Chicken Caesar salad! 🐔🥗
Peter Mugendi (Guest) on February 12, 2024
Why fall in love when you can fall asleep? 🛌💤
Stephen Kangethe (Guest) on February 11, 2024
I’m on the gin and tonic diet. So far, I’ve lost two days. 🍸😂
Tabu (Guest) on February 7, 2024
Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything! ⚛️🤓
Robert Ndunguru (Guest) on February 6, 2024
How does a bee brush its hair? With a honeycomb! 🐝🪮
Salma (Guest) on January 30, 2024
😅 I’m still laughing!
Peter Mwambui (Guest) on January 12, 2024
😂 Can't stop laughing!
Vincent Mwangangi (Guest) on January 6, 2024
I'm not lazy, I'm on energy-saving mode. ⚡😴
David Ochieng (Guest) on December 6, 2023
Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field! 🌾🏅
Mariam Kawawa (Guest) on December 4, 2023
Marriage lets you annoy one special person for the rest of your life. 💍😆
Mariam Hassan (Guest) on December 1, 2023
Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one! ⛳👖
Irene Makena (Guest) on November 30, 2023
Why do elephants never use cell phones? Because they can’t fit them in their trunks! 🐘📱